Thursday, March 29, 2007

Ugueth Urbina Sentenced to 14 Years

Former Major League Baseball pitcher Ugueth Urbina was sentenced to 14 years in prison for the attempted murder of five workers on his family's ranch, the Attorney General's Office announced Wednesday. The 33-year-old free agent was accused of joining a group of men in attacking and injuring workers with machetes and pouring gasoline on them at his family's ranch, located about 25 miles south of Caracas.
We always knew he was a little crazy when he was with the Red Sox. He had all the qualities that make closers great:

1. A slightly disturbing nervous tick
2. A good fastball with questionable control, and
3. A great nickname that fans can chant at the top of their lungs

If we'd only known he was skilled with a machete and gasoline we might have really had a Hall of Fame closer on our hands.

Good luck in jail Uggie.

1 comment:

Aaron_Strout said...

Jim, I'm laughing out loud right now as I read your last line, "good luck in jail ugie."

BTW, I heard this on WEEI this morning and thought what the hell was going through this guys mind. Gasoline and Machetes? Is this a bad Sly Stallone meets Chuck Norris movie? Unreal.